Thursday, December 27, 2012

Baguio Sci Camp - Doubting Feelings

I'm going back to Baguio! :) 2nd time! This time for my 4th year HS Sci-Camp! Heard more of my classmates will also camp this would surely be fun! :) I was sitting next to my closest girl friend she decided to be near the window so I am on the seat near the aisle which I'm not so comfortable with but it's ok I'll just sleep the whole bus ride. I think it would be 6-8 hours bus ride? I'm excited this time we will be the leaders of each group. Last year, we were just participants this time we will lead and guide batchmates and the lower batch students. :) Since the amount of students that will camp this year is more than last year some needed to sit at the foldable extra chair in the middle of the bus. He sat beside me it felt a little awkward knowing the guy on the right side somehow intended to sit near to me though I'm not sure what he thought about someone sitting in between of us and it's no big deal to me so I just let go of the thought away. So now all set, we are ready for Baguio! :) My favorite part in long trips is when we share snacks! First time I ate Ruffles, he told me it's his favorite it tasted like the saltiest chips I ate but oh well I'm fond of salty chips anyways haha! We shared snacks but I didn't want to eat a lot I'm a little nauseous during long rides. Until it's time to sleep to save some energy for the whole day activities on Day1. :) I felt a little uncomfortable because I was not on the window side and  a little colder than I expected good thing I have my jacket. Everyone was trying to sleep, just when I'm about to have my deep sleep he held my hand. I was left confused on why and what to do. Thinking about it he held it tighter my eyes were closed I was not sure what to do. Oh well, nobody sees it's under my jacket I'll just sleep it off maybe he will let go after some time? But then again, why?

At one point I think in the middle of some science activity I had time to tell my girl friend what happened. She was a little annoyed. "Ha? Bakit? Eh ano ginawa mo?" I was dumbfounded, "Ah, wala?" "Natulog?" "Hay nako ha may ganyan na syang factor." And so I thought oooppss maybe I really should have reacted. But did I not react or it really was my reaction? Whoops, don't even think about it. Not good to think about it. He's just a close friend maybe he's just also so comfortable with me? No malice? But I suddenly remembered when he first confessed his feelings to me one day during our third year high. No good. I think I'm starting to doubt my feelings?

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